Marital Problems
by Roxotaku
Summary: 2nd place winner at InuComedyClub on Livejournal for the "He Said, She Said," Prov. A new baby has caused friction between InuYasha and Kagome. Miroku and Sango try and help when their friends have a fight. Believe me, its a comedy!


The yelling and screaming could be heard all the way to Miroku and Sangos house

Marital Problems

Disclaimer: InuYasha belongs to Rumiko Takahashi & I make no from this story.

The yelling and screaming could be heard all the way to Miroku and Sangos house. The former demon slayer looked up at her husband from where she was feeding the children. Miroku regarded her with raised eyebrows, and put down his bowl of rice.

"I think you should go over there," Sango said. "I'll finish feeding the kids, and meet you there as soon as I can."

"Yes, you're right," Miroku replied, getting up from where he sat and heading for the door.

Ever since their baby had been born, there had been a lot of tension between InuYasha and Kagome. It seems it had finally erupted. Miroku winced at the sound of Kagomes piercing shrieks of accusation when he got up to the house, and InuYashas roars of retaliation could wake the dead….

"What's…" Miroku said, and had to duck a flying bowl or get hit on the head.

"You take that back InuYasha or I'm taking Yukio and returning to my time!"

"I dare you, wench!" InuYasha snarled. "How do you know the well will even work anymore!"

"Woh, woh," Miroku said, hands up, placating. "Just what is going on here?"

"Da, da!" Yukio answered from his cushion on the floor, and threw a handful of rice from his bowl at Miroku.

The monk looked down at the baby mildly, as he laughed at him, grains rolling down his clothes.

"Is that so Yukio?" Miroku said, "I think that is the best thing I have heard in this house yet so far."

"He said I'm fat!"

'Well, she is looking a little big in the ass,' thought Miroku.

"She said I'm lazy!"

'And she does not even work with him…' Miroku thought wryly.

"He said I'm a bad housekeeper!"

Shaking his head, Miroku took a step and something squelched under his foot…

"She said I can't get it up anymore!"

Looking at InuYasha's red face, Miroku tried not to smile.

"Well, can you call that partially cooked soba noodle an erection?"

'Oh, that's really hard…' Miroku thought, and tried not to laugh.

"Maybe I can't get it up because you are so fat!"

Miroku had to dodge another thrown bowl. When it got to InuYasha, he batted it away with sheathed Tessaiga. Unfortunately, the monk was not in time to duck and dodge that one – it hit him in the stomach, hard.

"Ooof!" Miroku said in surprise, and doubled over a little.

Yukio smiled in Mirokus face, and threw another handful of rice, squarely in his eyes. It was at that moment Sango made her entrance. Taking in the mess, the fuming couple, and her husband wiping rice out of his eyes, she put her hands on her hips and shook her head.

"Just what is going on here?" Sango said.

"Ma, ma!" Yukio replied, and threw more rice.

"Is that so little man?" Sango picked up the six month old and smiled.

The baby made a sneak attack and threw rice from his chubby fist in Sangos face. She blew it off and spit out what had landed in her mouth. He blew a raspberry at her and sprayed her face in spit.

"Look, it's not easy when you have your first child," Miroku said. "Things change between you, it's an adjustment."

InuYasha crossed his arms and looked at Miroku sourly. Kagome huffed and looked at the messy floor.

"How would you like to adjust to hardly any sex?" InuYasha grumbled.

"I'm exhausted!" Kagome wailed. "Raising a quarter youkai child is not easy!"

Sango and Miroku looked at each other. It's not like they hadn't had their own issues as parents. But this had to be resolved, for their own and the baby's sake.

"I think you guys need a break," Sango said. "Why don't you leave Yukio with us for the night, and have some private time just for yourselves."

"Yes, I second that," Miroku said. "We will be glad to do it – what's one more child?"

Sango cleared her throat, and her husband glanced over at her.

"It was your idea…" Miroku responded.

"Bring Yukio over after dinner," Sango said, handing the baby back to his mother. "And plan a nice night for yourselves."

The hanyou and his mate nodded, pacified for the moment. Then InuYasha looked up at Kagome wickedly.

"Better take a nap today," the hanyou said. "I got plans for you tonight woman."

Kagome looked up at her husband and smirked, combing her hair away from her face with her hand.

"Okay, you better be ready yourself," Kagome answered.

"It's settled then," Miroku said, clasping his hands in front of him. "This is just what you two need, you'll see."

Satisfied they had helped their friends, Sango and Miroku turned to go. They had not got far when…

"Take back what you said about me being fat…"

"I do not have a soba noodle for a cock…"

"You going to prove it?"

"Just you wait, woman!"

"Yukio, get out of the cooking pot!"

CRASH!!

Sango stopped and looked at her husband in trepidation. He shrugged and shook his head sadly. Then they both started to softly chuckle.

"Let's hope they leave each other in one piece by tonight…" Miroku said.


End file.
